This has nothing to do with some kind of Eternal Dibs situation, and everything to do with the fact that, by choosing to build a relationship with someone who treated her horribly, you're telling your friend you don't think what he did to her was all that bad. There's no two ways about it. She eventually started dating his best friend, and then are now married. Lynda, USA.
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However, how you ask will make all the difference.